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Portland's marijuana regulation process is endlessly confounding (more on that in a minute), but at least its hotline game is on point.

Today, the city's Office of Neighborhood Involvement (ONI) formally announced the creation of a new number—503-823-WEED—that you can call with all your questions about Portland's pot rules.

"Yes, we really do have a 503-823-WEED phone number," says Commissioner Amanda Fritz, who oversees ONI. "We are taking the responsibility of administering the sale of marijuana in Portland very seriously."

Easy to remember, sure. Catchy even! But you still may want 823-WEED on your speed dial. Here's a sample of the process ONI's cooked up for would-be pot entrepreneurs:

Today, the office announced it's accepting sign-ups for people who want to sell recreational or medical pot—or grow or process it—within city limits beginning next year. The city's not actually going to accept any license applications for weeks, but you'll get into a lottery that might give you favorable position when it starts accepting them on December 16.

Fair enough! Except none of that applies if you're an existing medical pot dispensary—there are more than 120 in the city—that meets a set of detailed requirements freeing you from the need to be at least 1,000 feet from other pot shops. Those dispensaries have been able to sign up since November 20, and, again, the city's not actually going to process any applications yet. It's just "scheduling intakes" for when it begins technically accepting applications on December 1.

To figure out if you qualify for dodging the 1,000-foot rule, there's a whole checklist. If you were licensed by the state on or before January 1 of this year, you're probably okay. If not, don't worry! If you can prove you were planning on opening a pot shop, you only have to have been licensed since September 30.

That's not the only checklist! Make sure you also do the other, larger checklist when preparing your application.

Oh, and put together some scratch! Depending on what kind of business you're planning, it could cost more than $10,000 in city and state fees to get licensed.

Got questions? Of course you do. 503-823-WEED.